In my previous post, I mentioned doing a deeper dive into talking in the play sessions. As I mentioned, yes, I do talk. It would be a little awkward if I were silent! I talk and am quite engaged…. but likely not in the way you imagine. As a Child Centered Play Therapist, I’m engaging your child in the way they communicate. As adults, we often forget our children are not “mini adults.” They do not have the brain development and the language skills to communicate about what is going on in their lives like we do so they work out their thoughts and feelings through their play. Let’s take a look at Andrew:
(from Association of Play Therapy; http://www.a4pt.org)
Wouldn’t it be nice to have an effective and thorough verbal communicator like Andrew?! Well, the good news is that children are effective communicators…just not the way we adults often articulate ourselves. If we begin to observe their behaviors and play as a way of communicating, we will begin to see what they are trying to “tell” us; we don’t need to question them to figure it out. So just as I would do with an adult…I pay attention and listen, and instead of asking questions and teaching them specific tools, I give them the time and space to show me what’s going on in their internal world. As they show me through their play, I am reflecting and summarizing what they are doing and saying. The more time we spend together, they begin to really internalize that there are no expectations from me on what they should or shouldn’t do with their time; they realize they are free to be themselves which leads them to feel free to communicate their internal world through their play. As our relationship grows, I begin to “enlarge the meaning,” extrapolating what they are showing me to their world outside the playroom. So, it is through this trusting relationship that they can explore freely the things that brought them into therapy, and by playing through it, they are able to work through it. This is the power of play therapy!
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